Home Wedding The Groom’s Role In A Wedding

B-Babe’s Note: This is a guest post by rif. I like that he puts in a lot of effort in the planning process. Heck, he came up with most of the wedding ideas. I just nodded my head in agreement! LOL

The stone-age mentality would be something like this:

Think like that…and you’ll be digging your own grave. My role as a groom in our wedding is slightly different.

As many of you know, we have engaged in the services of a wedding planner. But the biggest misconception people have is that with a wedding planner, the couple can just sit back and relax. Well you can, but that means you will be attending someone else’s wedding. In my opinion, the most important part of a wedding is the concept.

Concept is the general idea of your wedding. How the wedding generally flows will stem from this very idea. Do not underestimate this, as you will easily get confused in the midst of planning.

Imagine you are half way planning your wedding. You’ve chosen your hotel, your gown, your card design, your flower arrangements…and they are all what you’ve dreamt of since you were a child. But when it comes to things that you are less familiar with, you will ask your wedding planner for example, suggestions for the grand table decor, the design of the backdrop…etc.

The wedding planner will then throw you 1001 suggestions, based on his/her experience and understanding. What will an average joe do? Choose the nicest suggestion, obviously. But does it really suit your ambiance you have already chosen?

Wedding ambiance example
Having a concept guides you through the planning process. When in doubt, the couple can always revert back to the concept and decide from there. My role here was to come up with the concept. Just before Chinese New Year, my fiance asked me this very important question, “What are we going to do for the wedding?!” Think carefully guys. This question has more booby trap then the raider of the lost ark (in case you dont know, Indiana Jones).

What she’s really asking is not for specifics like what cake or what flowers you should get; she is asking for your idea of the wedding aka concept. Most guys will normally answer “anything-lah”. Two things will then pop into her head; “Does this guy even want to marry me? Seems like he doesn’t even care about it” OR “Muahaha…let’s spend all his hard-earned money”.

Well, I sure as hell didn’t want anything like that to happen and I am sure none of you guys would want to face that scenario. It is important to merge your concept with both your personalities. For example, both my fiance and I do not like flowers, so I came up with a concept that fitted our wants and want-nots.

The next step after the concept…is history. What have the both of you done together in the past that is significant to the relationship? What have you done individually that both of you have crossed paths with? For example: a couple might have met while diving since they both like the ocean and together they have visited some of the most beautiful coral reefs in the world. Then, it might be good to go with a concept that involves the sun, sea and sand.

Concept is never easy to come up with. It requires a long and thorough thinking process; what advertising people would call “chain of ideas”. Guys, give it some thought before answering your lady (*if you know what I mean) and ladies, please give your man some space (with an open mind), I am sure he has some ideas the both of you might fancy.

*Picture credits: google.com

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